Long time ago
Been a while since I last came ’round these parts. I reckon my attitude has been that maybe writing about ever’ little thang isn’t necessarily helping me out much, but much has changed… much has changed.
I find myself working harder than ever before to change things. I finally have begun – and stuck to – a plan to change my life, and the hardships have begun to come, as I knew they would. Floating along, you may avoid many hard places and deep pools, but you also don’t get very far. I am willing to work harder, and get a little further, so that all of my life isn’t complaining about things I am too lazy or unfocused to change.
Oh, my goals are set high! I have only to the end of this year to change myself physically so much that I no longer have the medical issues that being lazy and indulgent so often create. I am terrified to face, and yet have no choice but to face, my coming tax bill, and solving my financial troubles needs to happen this year too. I even have this crazy dream of singing a song I’m learning in Spanish to my family at the July 4th throwdown at my Dad’s, with me playing guitar or bass and my brother playing along and maybe even a cousin or two. Keep in mind that I cannot speak Spanish yet, have a pretty awful voice, and can’t play guitar. Haven’t touched a bass in years. Are my goals unrealistic? Possibly, but I’m so used to failure that even slight wins take me a million miles high.
I was planning to buy some cheap acoustic to learn on, but then the Firebird decided to cost me $700, so all the stress I went through for freelance last month was… well, I’m glad I had the money, but I sure woulda rather bought me an acoustic and some tickets to Green Bay for the Slobberbone casino shows. Ahhhh, well… it ain’t over ’til it’s over.
Wish me luck.
